July 23, 2012

When God Says Not Now

Photo by anankkml @freedigitalphotos.net


Hearing God speak is such weird thing. When I hear others talking about hearing from God, my first thought is "What did He sound like?" I always think of God talking in an audible voice. And while I have had God speak to me in a dream, I have never heard an actual voice when I am wide awake. It's more of an impression. A feeling. An overwhelming sensation gripping my heart, making my body come alive with awareness...an awareness of God's unmistakable presence.

God spoke to me last weekend and I was overcome.

I'd been wrestling with my writing, not being able to focus, not being able to hear my characters talk or see their futures in my head. I've also felt a guilt about not being more involved in my church. Sure, I go to our church worship gathering every Sunday. I sing on the Praise Team. I teach children's Bible Class every now and then. But what am I doing to help my husband in his work? What am I doing to further God's mission in this world through our church? I haven't been using my gift of hospitality. I haven't been serving others...just myself and my writing.

All of these things were on my heart last weekend, and Sunday morning I prayed that God would speak to me so that I would know His will for me. I told Him I was expecting Him to speak in a way that brooked no  argument. And He did.

The whole church service spoke, from the songs to the sermon, God whispered to my heart. What was so cool is my husband, who I had not shared any of this with, got up and spoke words throughout his sermon that blew God's breath over me. He said (paraphrased), "In the story of the prodigal son, it's not just the wayward sinners who end up in the pig pen. It's us. We get in a place where we put our wants and desires before God. We lose our focus. He wants more for us. He has more for us. But what does God want from you? Has He been speaking to you?"

Well, yes, He has! God spoke to my soul, and He has told me to give up my writing for publication to focus on Him and His mission. I don't believe He wants me to give it up forever, but I know He has asked me to set it aside for a time to revel in His presence and rediscover my love and passion for Him.

So while I am not writing for publication at this point in my journey, I will continue to post in my blog what God is teaching me, what great books I am reading, and what fun things I am up to.

And oh, how I love to have fun!

So has God been whispering to you? 

14 comments:

  1. Oh, Sherrinda. I recently wrote a blog post that was similar. I don't believe God is calling me to stop writing for publication, but to stop putting so much emphasis on it in my own mind. I need to relax and enjoy the process and take time when I need it for other things. It's a hard thing to do, but He and I are working on it together. I love that you are seeking Him on this and that He spoke so clearly to you. I love reading your blog posts and I will be praying for you as you follow His leading.

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    1. Hey Gabrielle, I remember reading your post and I remember how it really resonated with me. Following God and His leading is such a fantastic journey. Not always easy, but never dull!

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  2. I love your obedient heart. Giving up dreams for even a season is tough.

    When my writing got ahead of God, He reminded me of what He told Abraham when he was all concerned about having a son and getting his promise fulfilled: "I am your exceedingly great reward."

    No promise is greater than the One who gave it! Love you, friend!

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    1. Oh Jessica, I love that promise! Thank you for that remember that HE is the reward! It is a truth that is a forever promise.

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  3. Wow, amazing story. When God speaks like that you have to listen. He knows best and has His timing all worked out for you. :)

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    1. Thanks, Jennifer. He always knows best, doesn't He? :)

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  4. Sherrinda, can I just say I so admire your willing, obedient and trusting heart. I want to be like that...willing to obey even when it's hard...to trust God's perfect plan and timing above all else.

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    1. Thanks, Melissa. I don't feel all that inspiring...mainly because I wrestled for a LONG time about this, not really being obedient, you know? But I am trying to follow and I know His timing is everything.

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  5. I know this was a struggle for you, but when you place your life in God's hands and under His direction, you won't be steered wrong. You have my support, my prayers and as always, my friendship.

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    1. Oh Ava, you are a jewel! I love our friendship!

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  6. God will bless you for listening to His leading. I know it can't be an easy decision. God is always glorified when we obey, especially when it's hard.

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    1. Thanks, Erica. I am trusting in God and praying my way through it! And YES...it has been difficult. But He is faithful.

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  7. Wow, what a testimony, Sherrinda!! I do feel God nudging me, usually to do something I don't want to. LOL But He blesses us for it, grows us and strengthens us when we follow Him. Lots of blessings and love your way as you follow him! :-)

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  8. I really needed to read this. I have been struggling with a relationship and had no clue as to whether or not I should move on or be still. I have prayed throughout the duration of the relationship and everytime I get tired, he provides resolution. I prayed in tears on night and woke up to his answer "Not now". I knew in my heart that I am not in a place to move forwaard in the relationship because I have too many stones left unturned. God's answer placed me back on track and I will sit and wait on him.

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